Barely edited blog-worthy notes written at 1:08 AM (after a couple of beers and binging Netflix)

When I watch these American series, or when I talk to people, I feel so disconnected. I’m swimming against the current, like a motherfucking salmon.
Never had a high school sweetheart nor I fucked around in my twenties. I, instead, locked myself in on my teenage years and negated my twenties into one long relationship that I wasn’t even really engaged into.
All my peers and contemporary friends (friends for life) have settled and I’m just a generational misfit, fucking around in my 30s while having a mental and emotional maturity that doesn’t fit whatever the fuck I will embark myself into again, when I’m coming out of my shell of disability and emotional wreckage.

Am I gonna crash into my ex again? Are we gonna crash so hard into each other that we’ll finally disintegrate, split atoms, disappear?

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